A day in the life of Helen

*Helen, a kinship carer, gives us an insight into what life is like as a carer to her grandson.

What is the first spread to run out in your household?

Nutella

You leave the house, and your grandson has forgotten something. What is it?

His head! Thankfully that's attached so it would be his hat. Though it was on his head prior to walking out the door. I'm sure that hat has legs and mysteriously walks off and hides.

What takes up most of your day?

Appointments, cleaning, meal prep.

What's your favourite thing to do when you have free time?

Go to the waterfront and just sit in silence.

What is your least favourite type of homework?

Maths, particularly fractions!

What is your evening routine like?

After therapy, we play with the new puppy, do homework, dinner, spend an hour getting my boy to have a shower and clean his teeth. Spend time chatting about random things, then the time for bed avoidance begins.

What are your grandson's greatest strengths?

My boy is very kind-hearted and caring and has a love for all animals.

What's your grandson's current favourite show to watch?

Ben 10

How did you feel when your grandson arrived to stay with you?

I was super excited and super nervous all at once. My children were grown and suddenly I had a two-year-old in my house. I soon found out what areas of my home needed child proofing and got reminded of how far a toddler can spread his meal.

What are some of the ways you keep your grandson connected to family or culture?

We attend all NAIDOC activities, connected with Deadly Choices and attend all the kids' things they offer. We have connected with several local Indigenous families.

How has being a kinship carer impacted your life?

It has been the most rewarding commitment to see a terrified young toddler reach teenage years and feel loved and safe. I thought I would be in my retirement years now and off travelling the world. Instead, my boy travels with me (though not all over the world) and I have someone to share new experiences with.

If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why?

To take away the pain and suffering from children who have been victims of their environments prior to coming into care. Why? Because the trauma that they carry lasts for years/lifetime and children should not have to suffer.

If you could have 3 wishes for your children in care, what would they be?

That he knows he is loved to infinity, which he does. To love without fear. To feel safe.

How would you sum up being a kinship carer in one sentence?

The most rewarding commitment that I will ever make in my lifetime.

Do you have a special memory about a moment where you could see that you've made an impact in your grandson's life?

We were on a cruise and my boy didn't trust adults. Every morning while lining up for breakfast he started giving everyone high 5's. This continued all day every day and all the adults learnt his name and would call him for a high 5. By the end of the cruise, he was saying hello to everyone and instead of a high 5 he was giving out hugs. That cruise taught him that not all adults will hurt you, it changed how he interacted with unknown adults to him.

Why do you do it?

I was given an opportunity to make a difference in a toddler's life. That toddler is now a teenager and he has brought me such joy. Times can be tough, but the love supersedes that and I can't see my life without my boy right here with me.

*Not her real name.